When I read the other day that mommy bloggers were being accused of child neglect, I had to laugh.
Working mothers, distracted mothers, just plain old mothers – we’re simply Public Enemy No. 1, aren’t we?
Not only do we have to birth the future of the entire species but we have to do nasty, dirty work, risking life and limb for no pay and no thanks.
And now we have to take public censure and criticism.
From the people we’ve given life to. Collectively, you understand.
Where’s the justice?
Such is the life of a superhero. I believe Superman had it the same.
Except the birthing bit.
So before anyone comes after me telling me what an unworthy mother I am, I thought I would toss in a pre-emptive strike.
Here are eight reasons I am a bad mother.
I’m sure I could come up with twice as many but then I’d not be paying attention to my children would I?
8 Reasons I’m A Bad Mother
1. I let my kids eat peanut butter icecream for breakfast. I figure I’m hitting at least two food groups.
2. I let them watch music videos without watching them first. Even after I learned about Katy Perry.
3. I let them watch Gordon Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares even though he’s swearing so much the poor bleeper person can’t keep up.
4. Sometimes I pray they come home with no homework so I can stick them on the computer.
5. I buy Hanes underpants when they prefer Cherokee. According to my husband, this is very, very bad. Underpants are everything to a boy apparently.
6. I tell them to eat their lunch at the table. Then I sit on the sofa to eat mine.
7. I swear when they’re not out of earshot.
8. I mix up their names. After ten years. And don’t even notice.
I’m such a terrible mommy, I should be featured in the Wall Street Journal.
So there you have it. Can you do better than that? Am I a very, very dastardly mother? Or are you worse? Let me know in the comments, I dare ya!
If you liked this article, please do me a favor and share on Facebook or Twitter. There are buttons at the top and bottom of this article.
Or ‘like’ TSLWW Facebook page. I would so appreciate it! Thank you.
I am participating in a Blog Every Day For 30 Days Challenge advocated by Chris Brogan. I am doing this with the lovely Mary Ulrich who writes for Parents and Caregivers of Adults with Disabilities at Climbing Every Mountain. Check her out!