I am a very easy-going sort of person.
Flexible, adaptable. Extremes of emotional range are uncommon for me.
I’m pretty patient and relaxed.
I like to help people.
I am also not spontaneous and anything I do or say has probably been reflected upon, drafted in my head, edited, then edited some more before I act.
‘Be gracious’ is one of my mantras, and even when I’m upset, I try to take the high road.
But sometimes, people do things that make me want to incite acts of violence.
The painful, bloody kind.
It takes a lot to offend me. I’m big on choosing my battles and let a lot (some would say too much) go.
Someone usually has to push my buttons repeatedly for me to believe they really are prone to that behavior and it wasn’t just a one-off.
And then again, some behaviors are just so egregious, once is quite enough.
In the days when I wrote holiday cards, the following behaviors would get you struck off my list. If it carried on, I would say something.
Nowadays, well, I just unfriend you Facebook. 🙂
I do so hope, dear reader, that you do none of these. (Many involve cars and the lack of wise use thereof…)
11 Things That Drive me Nucking Futz!
1. Parking in handicapped spaces when you’re not. Handicapped, that is. There are no excuses. I don’t care if the space sits empty 90% of the time. Why do you think the rules don’t apply to you?
2. Texting, putting on makeup or other business that causes you to be monumentally distracted while driving. I would happily revoke licenses for life for these people if I had the power.
3. Abandoning your car at the curb at school pickup time. This thoughtless, insensitive act can snarl up traffic and otherwise placid minds all around town. Don’t do it.
4. Speeding in the parking lot especially around playgrounds, soccer fields and schools. You might be late, little Johnny might be making you crazy. It doesn’t matter. There are lots of people with big cars and little people in a small space. Slow down!
5. Obnoxious, mouthy children. I was brought up in an age and a family where children didn’t question or talk back to adults. Ever. Times are a-different and, my hands are up, my own children have their moments but ‘it’s my house, my rules, sonny, and you talk to me like that, you’re not invited back.’
6. Playing the victim on lifetime TV. We all act the victim from time to time. It’s allowed, often justified, even productive. For a short period. I’m not talking about that. I’m talking about those people who want to be seen as hard done by all the time. These people seem to think I should feel sorry for them and then get affronted when I point out that just a minor change in their action or thinking would make their life a lot easier. Then, somehow, I’m the bad guy. Complain all you want, just not to me. I have better things to do with my life.
7. Parents who keep their children dependent either by being needy or being their indulgent friend. Let them go, kick them out if necessary, and allow them to grow up to be mature, independent adults who owe you nothing and don’t form the basis of your social life. (This one could also be called ‘Parents who let their neuroses harm their childrens’ lives.)
8. Drive-by drop-offs. You know what I mean – the car barely stops moving before the child falls out onto the sidewalk and the car zooms off again. The child is left to make his own way to your door as you host the party, the playdate. By your thankless self.
9. Not taking ‘no’ for an answer. I dislike saying ‘no’ as much as the next person. It’s hard. So when I say it, I mean it. Accept it. First time. And stop fighting me.
10. Complaining after someone has done a favor. It’s ungrateful. And ungracious. Step up or step away.
11. Not respecting my boundaries and values. Like I wrote earlier, I am not spontaneous. Nor do I say things for fun. If I say 5:30pm, I mean 5:30pm. If I say no dessert, I mean no dessert. If I say he’s never been to McDonalds, don’t take him to Burger King. Twice.
What drives you nuckin’ futz? Any of these? Let me know in the comments!
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